"I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees."

[saucyirishlass.livejournal.com]

It's quite sad that I've thought about this for more than a couple hours...

I have a fantasy of going to a Laurell signing with something nasty written in French for her to signature. But more than that, I want to talk with her, 'cause I know she talks with her fans. Only, I'm of two minds about how I would handle it.


I could pretend that I'm one of the gushing fangirls and be really cloying when I tell her that "ardeur" is spelled wrong in her blog, and suggest that she maybe should have been more respectful of the negative fans because "after all, they're the ones who made you a bestseller in the first place." And as I'm almost ready to step away from the table, just one more thing - *voice cold* "don't emasculate men and portray all pretty, smart, assertive women as a petty, jealous bitches and call it feminism."

Or, I could come as I am. "I am Eve. I speak for the Haters." I would then proceed to tell her the same as above, only with far more candor and far less sugar-coating. Granted, it wouldn't make the last part nearly as dramatic, but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. =D

I'm almost ashamed that I've thought this out. I would probably never do it, but it's nice to fantasize.

Comments

[pith]

I don't know. If I went, I'd probably just do something like take GP with me and if she asks why that one, just say "Because I stopped reading at NiC."

[saucyirishlass.livejournal.com]

That's why it's a fantasy. I not only wouldn't have the courage, but I have better things to do with my time. But sometimes even petty notions that you would never follow through on can be fun to entertain.

And I was a fan. I am a fan. Are the only people allowed to talk to her the ones who have nothing but good things to say?

[sharkbytes.livejournal.com]

I'd wear my long leather coat and ask her to take a picture with me. Then, just before it would snap, i'd unbutton my coat, revealing a tshirt that reads "This woman writes MarySues" and an arrow pointing in her direction. Not that i've considered it, or anything :)

[saucyirishlass.livejournal.com]

It's a fine line, I think, but I am a fan with a complaint. We as a community are fans with complaints, or we wouldn't be here. We get to antagonize here because she's not here, and if I were to meet her in person, I think that boldness would fail me. But I don't think it's wrong to take those valid criticisms, or to say "I was offended that you showed such disrespect for people who gave you such support," in a venue designed specifically for an author to meet and talk with her fans face-to-face. Whether she or anybody else wants to claim me as such, I am a fan.

It would never happen in a million years, but I would love, in all honesty, to get to sit down with her and have a respectful, mature, but candid conversation about the series. I have no illusions that it's any more likely to happen than for Hell to freeze over, but once again, it is a (less petty) notion that I find fun to entertain.

[saucyirishlass.livejournal.com]

Oh, I know. But I can at least dream, can't I? *sigh*

[slayra.livejournal.com]

I think it could be fun (as a fantasy, not reality). If I had the courage for it. Still the best approach might be to open an account (are those free) at that petition website and then ask for people's signatures if 'they want the books to return to what they were before that ardUer thing'.

Of course, knowing her, she'd just dismiss it. She thinks too highly of herself.

[alorarose.livejournal.com]

haha, I was just gonna comment the same thing. Though I'd bring Lunatic Cafe. I have all sorts of love for that book. Or I'd bring Burnt Offerings. and if she asks why that one I can go "WAIT? THERE ARE MORE BOOKS?????"

[amamelina.livejournal.com]

Ok, Eve, that's scary. I was just having that same fantasy a few moments ago. o.O I guess great minds think alike!

[thekiwiwhoflew.livejournal.com]

I.. Would love you or anyone else to do this forever.

[ladymina.livejournal.com]

yeah that fantasy has something ...
and while I wouldn't do that, and can't do anything anyway - wrong continent, I was thinking about going to a bookshop with a signing wearing a shirt with some of the cooler antiLKH avatars printed on it and just incidentally buy some much better vampire books, the sookie stackhouse series or the undead series or something ...

[dwg.livejournal.com]

See, about the only thing that would come to mind for me would be just to get her to spell my name correctly (hi, my name is Margaret, and I've gone the majority of my life with people getting it wrong) if she was being nice and doing a Standard Dedication such as "best wishes *insert name her*, *autograph*"

That's all I'd ask, from a fannish side of things. I would personally love a sit-down, one on one, to go over things in her books with her and really have a pow-wow on her reasoning for doing things and my arguments about Why Things Suck...and it'd probably come across as the Bitchiest Editiorial Ever (or a Swift Kick To The Head?). But since that's probably not going to happen in my lifetime, I can just live with getting another copy of say, ID, going through it with a red pen and sending that to her publisher with a note saying, "I should not be able to pick out this many errors in a book, it reflects poorly upon you and your author. Edit, plz." and then promptly get added to some crazy list and then ignored.

I have but simple wants in life.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

Hee! I had a chat with someone who wanted to put post-its that said, "This book is bad! Do not buy it!" in LKH books and then hide out in book stores to see if people actually took notice.

I kinda want to try doing something like that now. I've already got all my friends being walking anti-recs for LKH...so...this would only be the next logical step toward world domination.

[jassanja.livejournal.com]

I think either way is a little petty. She's there to promote her to book to her fans and potential fans, not to let you air your grievances and potentially ruin it for her innocent, well meaning fans

No, I think it would be the only possible way to make her listen for once.
If one of "the haters" would be on every signing, she would see that there are more of them then she tries to convince herself

[freyalorelei.livejournal.com]

PLUS from what I hear you can't bring your own books to the signings anymore. You have to buy the books AT the store or you don't get to get in line to get it signed.

Wait, WHAT? Jesus, does this woman's greed know no bounds? I mean, let's say that (by some amazing miracle) I become a well-known published author and have fans flock to my signings. *knocks on wood* If someone shows up with a copy of my book, that assuredly means that they are in fact buying my product and paying for my career. I certainly wouldn't PUNISH them for supporting me by forcing them to buy an ADDITIONAL copy in the store!

This also begs the question, does she only sign books? No hats, tee-shirts, tote bags? What if they're obviously from her crappy little Cafepress store? Would she refuse THEN?

Gah, this woman makes my head hurt.

Butcher is better

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

I went to a Con last month that Jim Butcher was at. He'd sign anything including an old napkin and when the line was short, he'd talk to people who weren't buying anything at all. Same thing with Peter David. John Norman was almost insanely nice to some rather off beat fans.

Just thought I'm spend a moment spreading the love instead of the hate.

[saucyirishlass.livejournal.com]

And you're left with the realization that you can either keep going and ignore the shit or you can finally just not give a shit anymore.

I do both. Best of both worlds. ^_^

[catskin.livejournal.com]

*adores you for that*

[ladymina.livejournal.com]

something like that, done by the mass of us might make them wake up
or you know rub their hands, because everyone who sent in a copy, bought at least one, and most likely a new one now, to still have reference material ...

[dwg.livejournal.com]

I don't know how well they'd respond to it -- I had a copy of CS with 33 pages missing in the middle, spent a week looking up the publisher website and hunting down what to do, considering that it's a legit publisher error, then mailed the book back to them with a very polite letter to say, "Hey guys, 33 pages missing, see post-its." and then they took six freaking months to ship me a replacement copy. And by then, I'd gone out and bought a softcover version of the book, so I now have two copies of CS. It cost me the same amount to buy the second book and ship the goddamned original one back as the original hardcover would have cost.

So...I'm not terribly optimistic about the publisher thingy.

[tsubaki-ny.livejournal.com]

Ohhh... it might hav been better to take/send the book back to the seller. The publisher is gonna deal more with the editorial side (i.e., sending in a copyedited book might actually get their attention), but missing pages and that sort of thing are a printer error. They probably had to forward your query to a whole different location, not necessarily in the same state. That they replaced it is kind of awesome.

Re: Butcher is better

[tsubaki-ny.livejournal.com]

Terry Pratchett is another one who does this. *loves*

But is it an author decision, or an individual bookstore decision? I can see how it's in the seller's interest but I can't see why the author would care (unless he or she really thinks people love her enough to buy several copies. Wouldn't most people just wait to buy their copy in-store, then? Well, assuming they knew the score ahead of time, I suppose...)

[dwg.livejournal.com]

...it'd probably be easier if A) I'd actually bought the book in the first place (um...it was a gift from a friend) and B) I lived in the US. Their policy says that if there's an error, please send back the book and they'll replace it...and they did, it's just...well, six months later. And I know damned well it took about 2-4 weeks for the package to GET there.

[swiftgold.livejournal.com]

That would be interesting just to see how many signatures could be accumulated...

[queenbetsy.livejournal.com]

I just got back from RT, which MJD (the Undead series) pretty much ruled. She had by far the hugest line at the book fair, beating out even Charlaine Harris and (!) Jim Butcher. By her own admission, she found this startling and weird. She jokingly said that because LKH wasn't there, she (MJ) was getting all her overflow. But I dunno. I think LKH's god-awful writing is starting to catch up to her.