(no subject)

[fashi0n-mistake.livejournal.com]

 

The introductions to all the short stories in Strange Candy (and yes I gave in and bought it but it was on sale) are actually very interesting. And by interesting I mean, ‘O wow this is going to give me a headache if I think about it too much’ interesting.

 

 

I’m not going to post the entire introductions, just the parts that I think are important.

 

This is the introduction for A Lust of Cupids:

 

Editors loved it but not enough to buy it. One editor at one of the top-paying magazines at the time actually told me the truth: that since they published only one piece of fiction in each issue, I wasn’t a big enough name to help their magazine sales… When I was a big enough name to make a difference, I did not send the story back to her for another chance… Two, I’m petty… I rarely give second chances.

 

And this is exactly why you have gone from a decent writer to a bad one. She’s a petty woman (and she even admits it) and takes her revenge on the people she doesn’t like through her books.

 

I’m mean, there’s nothing wrong with getting some childish revenge every now and then, but she has taken it to a whole another level.

 

The Edge of the Sea:

 

The idea of it-that fear and longing that the ocean fills me with-will be visited at more length in an upcoming Anita book. Some of the characters introduced in Danse Macabre will be helping me explore some of the themes of this story in more loving, and even more frightening, detail.

 

Yeah okay she claims that the scary merman from this short story will be making a more frightening appearance in an upcoming Anita Blake book. And yet I have a hard time trying to be hopeful. When was the last time Hamilton actually wrote something dark? It’s been so long that I cannot even remember.

 

I’d mention A Token for Celandine but I don’t see the point of it. She just dares to compare herself to Tolkien and thus incites in me a homicidal rage. Really its best for everyone if I don’t even touch it with a ten foot pole.

 

Here be Dragons:

 

This is the only science fiction story I’ve ever completed. Hardware-oriented science doesn’t interest the writer in me. It’s the softer sciences that fascinate me on paper. Of course, just because it’s soft science doesn’t make it a soft story. One editor rejected this story by writing that it made her feel unclean. Cool.

 

This was my favorite story and it was everything that has been missing from the latest Anita novels. It was dark, it was creepy and it kicked ass. I want Hamilton to write like this again. Somehow I’m getting the feeling that it is not going to happen.

 

 

Oh and did anyone else noticed that the editors who rejected Hamilton’s works were all females?

 

Now to the two Anita Blake stories she gave us.

 

The Girl Who Was Infatuated With Death:

 

This story is set before the novel Narcissus in Chains. This is back when Anita is fighting the good fight to try not to give in every time she gets too close to her vampire boyfriend. Ah, how the mighty have fallen.

 

Truer words, I swear to God, have never been spoken. See! Even the author admits it!

 

Those Who Seek Forgiveness:

 

How different things would have been if I’d stuck to my original plan. No Jean-Claude, no Richard, not much of anybody except Anita. What a bleak world it would have been, with just Anita and me in it.

 

She says it would have been a bleak world but I can’t help but wonder if it would have been a better world.

Comments

[delphinapterus.livejournal.com]

I'm lost why does she say "I'm petty" like it's something to be proud of?

She obviously doesn't understand business* if she gets out of joint when she's told that her names isn't big enough to bring in sales figures. I hate to point out the obvious - successful magazines have sales figures. So why on earth she should take that as a personal insult is beyond me - especially when the editor liked the story and was sorry not to be able to publish it.

*Yes, I know LKH says she is a businness womyn with all her chatter about her cafepress merchandizing ties in.

[fashi0n-mistake.livejournal.com]

Apparently it's a good thing to be petty. Anita's petty too but then Anita is LKH so whatever.

I know that if the editor liked the story, and was sorry to not publish it, I would have sent it back when I become a 'big name'. Of course I'm like that.

...She's a 'buisnness womyn'? ...I have no words for that. Except that I think my headache just got worse.

[fashi0n-mistake.livejournal.com]

How is she a role model?

That is a question for the ages. We shall never know.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

Dear LKH,
I cannot say this enough: Biology is not a soft science.
Fuck you.
Margaret Bishop, BSc.

It will never stop pissing me off this flip-flop between, "I have a science degree!" and "Feh, biology is a soft science." NEVAR. *stomps, destroys*

Hey, I'm all for being petty and vindictive in writing, just so long as A) it's done in a clever way and B) you get away with it. However, creating a character so dumb that a frying pan can defeat it and then having your personal avatar trump it so you can crow, "HAA HA HA! I WIN, BITCH! SEE? I AM THE GREATEST OF THEM ALLLL!!!!" is not petty. It's just lame.

Then again, if nobody did that, ff.net wouldn't exist. XD

[nightspiritnyx.livejournal.com]

Where did she get her biology degree is she thinks that's a soft science? Biology is hard and complicated..

[dwg.livejournal.com]

I don't know! But either some science lecturors need to meet with "accidents" involving too much potassium hydroxide, or they need to be informed of what one of their former students is blathering on about, feel deep shame and then use LKH as an example in future classes of what not to do.

Ditto with the English department.

[fashi0n-mistake.livejournal.com]

If it's done in a clever way being petty and vindictive is amusing. The Alien director named the evil company after hated neighbors of his and I always found that amusing.

LKH is almost child like in her pettiness. No wait, it's an insult to children to say that.

And yes, the authors on ff.net are very petty.

*rolls eyes* I don't believe she actually has a degree when she filp-flops like that. It just doesn't seem very realistic ya know?

[dinsedaledarby.livejournal.com]

hey,
I'm with you when she mentions herself and tolkien in the same sentence Tolkien was a perfectionist who made sure that all of the details of his gigantic world were organized so he didn't make any mistakes. He even created languages and kept the rules straight. LKH could never do that with the same attention to detail that he had. So that did piss me off when she said that very much.

[fashi0n-mistake.livejournal.com]

I worship at the alter of Tolkien. Anyone comparing themselves or someone else to Tolkien or even mentioning 'I could write like Tolkien' makes me go homicidal.

So yes, I'm a very big fan. One might even say that I'm slightly obsessed. But only slightly mind you.

[cicipsychobunny.livejournal.com]

I totally agree.

[vanity-lost.livejournal.com]

She just dares to compare herself to Tolkien

She does WHAT??!! Her ego must walk into a room ten minutes before she does. Because there's ego and then there's comparing the author of poorly-written first person self-porn with TOLKIEN.

Yeah, Tolkien had faults and was human and all but... the only time I've heard of elves sexing it up in orgies of author-masturbation is in fan fiction. You know, that stuff LKH doesn't allow for fear her fans will write it better than her?

Wow. I hope her crazy is not contagious.

[catskin.livejournal.com]

*Learns from LKH* Next time an editor rejects a story of mine, ahagunna be all up in her grill, yo, giving it all "Fuck you bizzitch, I'm gonna be FAMOUS and and and YOU'LL BE SORRY and and and HOLD ME, JON!!!!"

[ladyravana.livejournal.com]

I’d mention A Token for Celandine but I don’t see the point of it. She just dares to compare herself to Tolkien and thus incites in me a homicidal rage. Really its best for everyone if I don’t even touch it with a ten foot pole.

...Wow. She compared herself to Tolkien. Tolkien, who has written one of the most beloved fantasy series of this century, and whose books were later made into award-winning movies.

*is genuinely shocked*

Oh dear. Poor Tolkien must be rolling in his grave. I weep for the poor man.
I just hope she lays off of C.S. Lewis. I don't want her to end up ruining everything I loved in my childhood.

I even heard that someone on the forums declared her the next Tolkien.

I swear, I'm not making this up.

[alex-ogre.livejournal.com]

But that's normal. Since TOlkien is considered by many to be the pinnacle of fantasy writing, you obviously can't be anything other than a hack if you're not the next Tolkien. At least not in Fanboy Land.