Blogflog: These are not the themes you seek. *Jedi wave*

[dwg.livejournal.com]

I just woke up, and behold, LKH has gifted me with something so very, very beautiful.

I blinked blearily through the first part -- blah, blah, comics as GP#7 marked the end of Brett Booth's art. From #8 onward we get Ron Lim. I remember a while back that there was an announcement about this and this is the reason why GP#7 has been delayed. That, and apparently Stacie M. Ritchie is no longer doing the script adaptions, but nobody saw fit to mention her departure.

Apparently, Blood Noir been fully edited and will be sent back to the publisher in New York (PH34R!) and LKH has been working on Merry Gentry #7.

And succeeded in coming up with a title.

Brace yourselves.

When [Blood Noir] goes off to New York, I get to work on Merry #7, which finally has a title; SWALLOWING DARKNESS.

The bold is completely my emphasis. My only reaction to reading this is, "OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD."

What a wonderful way to wake up, eh?

We're putting the title in the fan club newsletter that should be going out in about five days, and we're putting the new title in it. But I couldn't wait to share. MISTRAL'S KISS, A LICK OF FROST, now, SWALLOWING DARKNESS; I sense a theme.

The first four books had their theme; A KISS OF SHADOWS, A CARESS OF TWILIGHT, SEDUCED BY MOONLIGHT, and a STROKE OF MIDNIGHT. It would be nicely linear if we did four books with the men's name theme, then four more with another theme, but the name theme may go for more than four books. I think it will. I'm already working on new ideas using some of the other men's names. We'll see.

THIS IS NOT THE THEME YOU SEEK! *Jedi wave*

SWALLOWING. DARKNESS. WTF. THESE GOGGLES DO NOTHING.

Discuss.

Comments

[easol.livejournal.com]

Oh, lemme guess -- more deep-throating! Guuhhhhhhh... sounds like her "poetic" way of describing oral... blech...

[daphne-gateau.livejournal.com]

It totally does. She calls it a men's name theme. It feels more like an oral fixation theme to me. What's next Gargling Galen?

[quizzicalsphinx.livejournal.com]

. . . I'll be back as soon as I figure out something sharper and more witty than "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME."

[a-proclivity.livejournal.com]

That kinda makes me want to yack.

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

I kind of thought about gagging instead.

[ayako.livejournal.com]

Swallowing Darkness. Oh Laurell, you're just making it way too easy.

[drho.livejournal.com]

Um. . . That title is so pathetic and cheesy. It's like an adult trying desperately to fit into clothes from the teen section. It's just unfortunate.

[lastshotringing.livejournal.com]

THAT IS DISGUSTING.

D:

[lastshotringing.livejournal.com]

WHAT BOTHERS ME THE MOST IS THAT SHE PROBABLY THINKS SHE'S BEING SUPER CLEVER AND WITTY.

D8

/ANGST CAPS

[daphne-gateau.livejournal.com]

MISTRAL'S KISS, A LICK OF FROST, now, SWALLOWING DARKNESS; I sense a theme.

I sense one too. It's a crappy-title-crappy-plot theme.

[sharkbytes.livejournal.com]

Oooh she's so *~nouveau~* and original! *vomit*

It's like when someone tells a corny, cheesy joke and elbows the person next to them in the ribs. "Get it?! Kiss, Lick, and now SWALLOWING! Hee! I am so very clever!"

She's the "literary" equivalent of Gallagher.

[vlredreign.livejournal.com]

Swallowing My Babydaddy.

Oh, no...can't she just change Frost back into a real boy? Sigh.

Sorry it's pink, but Doyle's peen is running away.

[genchaos.livejournal.com]

*stares*

Your icon. It hypnotizes me.

[everstar3.livejournal.com]

Do. Not. Want.

[assplund.livejournal.com]

Oh my god. I think I'm going to puke.

[chubling.livejournal.com]

That is just one of those times that you aren't sure if you should laugh or cry.

[windiain.livejournal.com]

I'm going with both. Hysterical laughter that degenerates into anguished sobbing.

[caiyene.livejournal.com]

ROTFL!!!

At first I was reading and I was like "Swallowing Darkness" is not that bad. It's a good title for a Dark Fantasy book

Then I was like... oh right it's Merry

OMGWTFBBQ!!

She cannot name it Swallowing Darkness...any idea just how corny that is? That's...thats just on the wrong side of bad!

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

I think she should have gone with Darkness Within Me.

[were-lemur.livejournal.com]

Wow. Classy.

[cicipsychobunny.livejournal.com]

It's been so long since I've read any Merry books that it took me a moment to remember that "Darkness" is Doyle's nickname. I THINK IT MADE THE HORROR WORSE.

[tsubaki-ny.livejournal.com]

LOL -- I was sitting here wondering "So wait, is the character's name 'Darkness' or 'Swallow'?"

[sei-kun.livejournal.com]

...*prays that this means Merry will start on cannibalism, starting from the one whose name appears on the title*...

[unrund.livejournal.com]

*points to her Icon*
*laughs and laughs and laughs inbetween bouts of running away*

[easol.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that sums up my state of mind.

[guardians-song.livejournal.com]

...
..
..
(Yes, the last two ellipses were not even worth all three "."s.)

LORD.

Oh my Lord. The woman has finally gone off the deep end, hasn't...

Well, she already had, by... oh my gad.

*tries to scream, but it strangles* *just dies*

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

In all seriousness I keep comparing Britney Spears to LKH.

They both seem to crave attention-even if it is negative attention
They both wear inappropriate clothing
Don't get me started on parenting techniques
They both are exhibitionists

Any other similarities?

[guardians-song.livejournal.com]

#8: KIDDO'S KISS

Author Laurell K. Hamilton was detained today on suspicion of publishing child pornography. Her only response was "What do you mean? That was a TYPO! His name is KITTO! And he's older than Christianity! So what if he dresses in shorts, is timid, always needs protection, is mostly hairless, and is only four feet tall, and always described as weak and generally implied to be childlike? He's well-hung!"

Disgruntled ex-fans say "We've been expecting this one for a while... Just didn't think she'd be so BLATANT about it."

Most notably, in the current book, the "Kitto" character's voice has finally broken. The main character, Merry Gentry, is shocked and revolted by this development, and befriends Michael Jackson.

Developing...

[booster-blue.livejournal.com]

*dies*

[nicbemused.livejournal.com]

(one side of mythical conversation a sane person might have in that household)

Laurell, hun, they were kidding. No, REALLY, they were kidding. They didn't actually mean you should call it that.

Snark. Yes, like wit and sarcasm combined. They were snarking at you.

No, this is not generally considered a good thing. Probably not actual fans, no.

Yes, hun, call the publisher. Have them name it something other than oral sex. Yes, that phone, there, with the numbers. No, I'm sorry, I don't have a dial one, just touchtone. Fine. Tell me the number and I'll dial, you talk. Into the handset, yes. No, I don't have one of those cone things you talk into. No. No. JUST TALK DAMMIT!

Jon, you can use a computer, please find a route that DOESN'T take you by the local XXX theater when she practices with the Foose.

[suzycat.livejournal.com]

Swallowing Darkness? Is that what Merry would look as if she'd done if she was black? Not black like a person, black like an animal's fur or possibly the complete blackness of night. Oh wait. Maybe it's what Doyle looks like he's been doing after he's had a good shag.

[darkese.livejournal.com]

Black like the darkness of an ebony kiss?

weeee..I'm a writer too now Mommy! Royalties now, please.

[kessie.livejournal.com]

OH GOD NO. *WEEPS*

[glitterbats.livejournal.com]

...Vore?

[assplund.livejournal.com]

Who at this point is no longer a man.

Do you mean in the literal or the figurative sense?

[dan-lian.livejournal.com]

The fact that she feels the need to churn out a book or two a year now horrifies me. I am appalled, astonished and horrified by her title choice. This is... I think I need to cry now. And shriek in horror and run far, far away.