Subtle. LKH does not has it.

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

(Apologies if this has already been posted/snarked at...I've been away for a while and didn't see anything in the recent entries.)

So the upcoming Merry Gentry is going to be titled...drumroll please..."Swallowing Darkness". Yes, that's right, "Swallowing Darkness".

*facepalm*

Yyyyyeah..."subtle" is apparently not in LKH's vocabulary. Why not get right to the point and call the book "Lots and Lots of Lame-ass Sex Scenes In Which Our Heroine Just Can't Get Enough And Oh Yeah I Guess There's Some Kind of Plot. Somewhere. I Think."

Honestly, I only read the Merry books for the snark value now, and I don't even bother with Anita. When I want good paranormal lit I'd much rather go for J.R. Ward's Black Dagger series or Susan Squires's Regency-era vamps or anything by Anne Bishop (who has a new Black Jewels book out in March, hurrah!).

Comments

[easol.livejournal.com]

I was under the impression that her editors banned anything too explicit, but apparently her prose sent them to sleep.

I mean, what's next? "Dry-Humping Death"?

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

I guess "Deep-Throating Darkness" was a little too obvious, even for LKH.

[drygo.livejournal.com]

I'm peronally looking forward to reading, "Schtupping Sholto" and "Gagged by Galen."

[genchaos.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I phased out the whole Merry series once I read about her whining about how her menage a' mansluts had to come inside her to knock her up so she couldn't get the bukkake she so wanted from them.

OH, BITCH, WE SHOULD ALL BE SO UNFORTUNATE.

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

I'm still waiting for the bukkake scene. Straight to the face.

No. Oh, Gods, please no. Unfortunately, I think you're right...now that she's preggers by three (or is it four? I lost count) different guys at the same time, Merry can do whatever the hell she wants in her bedroom. I cringe to think of the horrific sex scenes awaiting us in SD and any subsequent Merry books.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

*passes brainbleach in advance* oh no, it's six fathers. Three for each babeh.

My only consolation is that there aren't any assweaselsbabies, but for that to happen, there'd have to be ghey. And we can't have that, nooo.

[phyrra.livejournal.com]

I love your icon.

And yes, she's as subtle as getting hit over the head with a 2x4.

[assplund.livejournal.com]

OMG I totally forgot about the new Black Jewels book! Thanks so much for reminding me--now I have something to look forward to. And it almost makes me feel better about... Swallowing Darkness. *retching noises*

[suzycat.livejournal.com]

Hey, wait, didn't I call this? Or something similar?

I want to know if, after swallowing darkness, Merry will magickally become black. Not black like a person, black like the inky darkness of the darkest moonless, starless night, or possibly like a panther.

She'll probably become a glowing black pearl, somehow not clashing with her own hair.

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

Not black like a person, black like the inky darkness of the darkest moonless, starless night, or possibly like a panther.

*snerk*

[frabjously.livejournal.com]

So so hilarious.

[genchaos.livejournal.com]

Black Jewels hubbajubba WHAAA??

Oh, dammit, now I know about this I'll have to read it. Especially if it involves the usual crew of Jaenelle and her merry band of nutcases.

(Now Bishop? Is someone that can take a character with all the trappings of a Mary Sue and turn her into anything *but*.)

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

Oh, it sounds like it's going to be fantastic. It's about Jaenelle and Surreal and the Black Widows and...well, check it out here (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0451461606/ref=wl_it_dp?ie=UTF8&coliid=I26IT61ZCLO8TG&colid=IBFTAP1N39UC). I'm trying to decide between pre-orderong from Amazon or hoping there's a good Borders coupon that week.

[genchaos.livejournal.com]

YES! Surreal is made of win. *goes to look* And the Black Widows definitely could use some going into.

[zombiexbunny.livejournal.com]

I did not know this either.

This makes me a happy bunny.

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

There's an excerpt at www.annebishop.com . Now that I've read it, the only words that come to mind are OMG WANT.

[zombiexbunny.livejournal.com]

Hee!

Good ole' Daemon :D

[othellia.livejournal.com]

The news surrounding Swallowing Darkness was first posted here (http://community.livejournal.com/lkh_lashouts/329254.html). But the title's so mindnumbingly stupid that I think it can slide the second time. XD

[icewyche.livejournal.com]

Whoops. I missed that. My bad.

[hookncrook.livejournal.com]

I want to know what Merry swallows of the Darkness!