Blog Flog!

[othellia.livejournal.com]

Original Blog

Me: Normal
LKH: Bold



Trinity is with her father, so Jon and I have been on our own.

Wow. This is the first time she's mentioned Richard Gary in a long. And warning! Laurita + Jonboi alone! It's the beginning of the impending apocalypse.

Friday was socializing with the writing group.

Writing group? She has a writing group!? I know this was mentioned in an earlier post, but it bears repeating. After all, I'm pretty sure LKH + Writing Group doesn't mix well in our heads.

Saturday Jon and I watched three hours of Tivo television that we'd been trying to see all week.

Because it's impossible to fit in TV time when you work at home all day writing smut/soap opera novels.

Saturday night was serious date night and grown-up time. I'd tell you what we did, but then I'd have to kill you.

*pours on brain bleach*

Why? Why does she feel the need to mention this in her professional blog? She's worse than Amber TMI-ing to House about Wilson. Especially since they're fictional and LKH is real... and scary. But really. TMI.

Your clearance is not high enough, yet.

Wha-? You wrote this in your professional PUBLIC blog, woman! There is no such thing such as clearance when it comes to the un-passworded internets. Apparently she thinks we're too stupid to pick up on the TMI and must have SEX spelled out to us, one "Fuck me, Micah" at a time.

Today, Sunday, we saw Iron man with our friends Mark and Sarah.

She has a girl friend besides Darla? I think this is a breakthrough people! The first time one's ever been mentioned!

We had lunch before the movie at The Blue Owl in Kimmswick. They have great food, and deserts that are so dangerous that just looking at the case gives you a sugar rush.

Okay. I will admit. "Deserts" are pretty dangerous. I haven't ever gotten a sugar rush while looking at any though. Haven't gotten a sugar rush while looking at desserts either.

Sarah and I have been going there for a girl's lunch for years, but it's only been in the last few years that we've included our husbands and made it a couple thing.

Jon's her... oh yeah. Forgot. XD

As for Sarah, not once have I seen LKH mention her in a blog, even though apparently they've been friends for ages. I can understand the whole "not mentioning friends for privacy," but LKH has blown the concept of "privacy" out of the water...

... numerous times.

The decision for the evening is do we eat dinner, or do we eat the deserts we got from the restaurant? There's no way to do both.

Personally, I think edible food is more appetizing than sand, but I suppose this can be amended if the animals living in the desert count as part of the desert as well. But then again, if that was the case, there would be no way that a person could finish off an entire desert. Couldn't finish it off even without the animals.

But really... There's a way to eat dinner and dessert and still finish both. All you do is order a smaller course or one of the appetizers. I do it all the time.


EDIT: Fixed minor homophone errors. Her dyslexia is contagious, I swear. D:

Comments

[suzycat.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the whole "AND THEN WE HAD SEX HOT SEXY ADULT SEX, because we are SEXUAL in our SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP" is a bit much.

[kuzunoha.livejournal.com]

"AND THEN WE HAD SEX HOT SEXY ADULT SEX, because we are SEXUAL in our SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP"

...

Lol.

I want to say that all the time now.

[nimnix.livejournal.com]

She talks about having sex like it's a momentous occasion and not something couples normally do. Who are the people who are still shocked and titillated when she hints at having sex with her husband?

Wait, are we supposed to assume she's having all kinds of edgy kinky omg-you-naughty-sex-goddess type stuff and sit here conjecturing on what *cough* new and fascinating *cough* tricks she's exploring? I can do my own research LKH, kthx.

[frabjously.livejournal.com]

You mean Laurell and Jon don't sleep in separate beds? How scandalous.

[karmyn75.livejournal.com]

Is she implying that she doesn't have sex when her daughter is around? Because people have been known to have sex when there are children in the house. It's when you wait until the kid(s) is/are asleep and then lock your door.
Unless you're my parents. Never quite gotten rid of that image.

[cicipsychobunny.livejournal.com]

I think there have been multiple blogs where yes, she's basically said "Woo, no kid, IT'S BUSINESS TIME".

[estllechauvelin.livejournal.com]

It really does sound that way to me. I wonder how she thinks parents manage who are still together, and therefore don't share custody with anybody who will get the kid out of the house. Does she think that the birthdates of younger siblings are always nine months after a time that all the older siblings were at summer camp or sleepovers?

Of course, considering how much noise her Sue makes, maybe there's a reason nobody but her and Jonboi can be in the house.

And doesn't she say that Saturday was "serious date night and grown-up time"? Now, I could stand for knowing a lot less about "grown-up time" than she tells us, such as the fact that they had it. But didn't the "date night" part of the evening basically disappear in the mountain of coy TMI? There's no reason not to talk about that, right? It wouldn't be any different than talking about going to the movies together in the middle of the day, or going out with the other couple on Sunday. Unless of course "serious date night" and "grown-up time" mean the same thing, in which case she was repeating herself. If they don't, then obviously she's much more interested in the part of the evening that she couldn't talk about than the part that she could have. Does anybody else imagine her out at a movie or a nice restaurant just being annoyed that they couldn't cut straight to the "grown-up time"?

Looking back to the original blog, to make sure there wasn't something about "date night" that didn't make it into the excerpts:
especially when watching with my sweetie beside me.

Her "sweetie"? Hmm. Who else routinely uses this word that a grown woman really shouldn't? Actually, I can see using "cute" words in direct address, but not when you're talking about somebody in third person. Call him "sweetie" in private if you must, but not when you are describing his relationship to you.

[gehayi.livejournal.com]

The dangerous deserts that induce sugar highs are what get me.

Also, here's the Blue Owl's menu (http://www.theblueowl.com/menu.html). Looks like it's more "desert" than dinner.

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

How about ordering a soup and salad and then splitting a dessert or two for the table. That's why my friends and I do.

[dreamstrifer.livejournal.com]

Actually, the Blue Owl is pretty good. I've been there several times. Not ever at the same time as LKH, thank my lucky stars.

There's no deserts in Kimmswick, though. Just a lot of quaint, overpriced shops. XD

[tsubaki-ny.livejournal.com]

Mmmmmm. Cheesecake.


(sorry, was distracted)

[mizmalice.livejournal.com]

There's too much information and then we have HER who is an oversharing category of her own.

[jerel.livejournal.com]

Life is uncertain, so you should always eat dessert (and not desert) first.

My best friend S and I often do this. We have a weakness for cobblers and shortcake--things with ice cream. Which tend not to travel well. However, most restaurants give you a ton of food anyway. So you eat dessert and take the unfinished part of dinner home. Now you have lunch for the next day! See, not that hard.

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

I wonder if "friend" Sarah is a member of the writing group and maybe LKH takes her out for dessert as an apology.

[dreamstrifer.livejournal.com]

OIL DRILLS?!

*dies*

LKH has seeped thoroughly into my brain. Or I just developed my dirty mind thoroughly thanks to my theatre friends.

[othellia.livejournal.com]

Or perhaps she had to go to the Cheyenne Mountain Complex. Jonboi, Laurell, and her alter ego, Anita, were needed to defeat the Goa'uld through Deus Sex Machina.

[morriganscrow.livejournal.com]

At one point she says she has been a coach potato, watching TV.
I now have the image of a spud, in a window seat, on a Greyhound bus, heading for Oregon.

[thetathx1138.livejournal.com]

Or she has a secret affection for the long-running sitcom starring Craig T. Nelson.

[knowthyself.livejournal.com]

That she mentions this stuff in her professional blog....yeah, seriously. That's extremely UNprofessional. Go get a psuedonym and friends-lock some entries on LJ like the rest of us, and spare the public the details of your own personal sex life.

[evareia.livejournal.com]

Your clearance is not high enough, yet.

I love this sentence because it implies that at some point in the future, our clearance might become high enough to hear about her icky sex life. What will that be, another permission slip on your website? Do I have to have my mommy sign it so I can read about you licking Jon's frost?

TY, Laurel, but I'm going to pass on that honor.

[soup-of-the-dog.livejournal.com]

That was what I thought and then I was terrified. I NEVER want clearance that high.

[kerame.livejournal.com]

"...this weekend has been about fun."

Trinty's presence = Not Fun.

"I have actually taken the entire weekend off."

But she can't spare the time to eat breakfast with her daughter on a snowday.

Her Trinity avoidance tactics may be responsible for the continuation of the series. If Gary had full custody, I don't think she'd bother to waddle into her child-free refuge office at all. She'd probably just lie in bed, awaiting her regular deliveries of fresh food and boy flesh, having wet-dreams about her dozens of long-haired, big-dicked, submissive royal love-slaves, and slowly dissolving into a pool of drool.

[christraven.livejournal.com]

If that's so, then somebody needs to get Trinity permanently out of the house.

No Trinity = nothing to avoid, so no reason to write = no more plotless Pr0n-filled BSO's.

Oh, the beauty of such a notion...

[icecreamempress.livejournal.com]

Saturday night was serious date night and grown-up time. I'd tell you what we did, but then I'd have to kill you.

OH NO. YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TO KILL ME BECAUSE I SWEAR TO GOD THAT MY BRAIN WOULD EXPLODE IF YOU TOLD ME ABOUT YOUR SEXXORS WITH PASTY MCFAWNALOT.

[thetathx1138.livejournal.com]

Ten bucks says it involves cosplay from her own books.

[recrudescence.livejournal.com]

*perks up* So, excited for House tonight? (That's kind of a creepy parallel to draw, by the way. I don't want Wilson banging LKH!)

[othellia.livejournal.com]

Well... I don't like Amber very much, though she is much better than LKH...

And yes, I'm excited. :D

[watersheerie.livejournal.com]

"We had lunch before the movie at The Blue Owl in Kimmswick. They have great food, and deserts that are so dangerous that just looking at the case gives you a sugar rush."

"Okay. I will admit. "Deserts" are pretty dangerous. I haven't ever gotten a sugar rush while looking at any though. Haven't gotten a sugar rush while looking at desserts either."

Well, this is the woman who claims that looking at a uber-hot long haired bisexual guy can make your 'pulse speed up' and 'tighten things down low.' That last statement makes me think of an action like tightening a screw or some sort of bolt, but we all know that Anita is always unscrewing and loosening things down there.

"Gotta get my vag-wrench and unscrew it a few notches, so I can fit a few more monstrous penises."

[longtail.livejournal.com]

I love how she gives out the names of favorite places she goes when she constantly tells people that she wants her privacy. *eyerolls*

And I'm really surprised at the mention of her writing group. I thought she dropped that a long time ago.

[kerame.livejournal.com]

I think the only reason she went back was to show off her Foose.