Reality lines are blurring

[easol.livejournal.com]

First, I must complain that LKH is taking ALL the stuff I love and rambling about it. Now it's Fido! WAH!

Anyway, I had to flog this blog because it's just so damn creepy. I don't know if this woman realizes how unspeakably creepy it is that she talks about her Mary Sue as if she were living in her own little world. Which she is, but not in quite thew same way.

http://blog.laurellkhamilton.org/2008/01/some-wounds-never-heal.html




No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader.
Robert Frost

Does it shock anyone that the next line is "No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader"?

Frost is one of my favorite American poets. There are poems of his that I reread periodically.

Ye gods! She reads something besides the captions on TV! Now if only we could make her read her OWN stuff.

It's always nice when one of your literary heroes agrees with your own philosophy of writing.

I must have missed the "pomes" where Frost went on about giant penii, subservient girly-men, and the utter joy of serving the Crotch.

Of course, perhaps reading his work when I was in my mid-teens helped shape my own attitude towards writing.

See, people? She's REALLY REALLY, like, deep and stuff! She reads POEMS and things! I bet she like, wears black nail polish and listens to, like, GOTH music!

If you haven't finished the book, this is your last chance to stop reading and save the surprise, no, the shock.

I'm not sure what is shocking about ANY addict ending up badly...

Okay, I have to assume if you're still reading, you know what I'm about to type. Here goes: Seeing Ron Lim's art, with Phillip chained against the wall, so helpless, so hopeless, really hurt me.

Ironic. Sounds more like something Anita would find a major turn-on, be so very shocked and yet titillated by it, and give Phillip healing sex.

It's been over ten years since I wrote GUILTY PLEASURES. Over a decade since I created Phillip,

Yes, folks, a decade is ten years. And by the way, it's more like fifteen years now, but I don't think LKH wants to think about that.

and had to watch him die.

How do you watch someone die if they, you know, exist only in book pages?

And this, folks, is where it starts getting a little odd.

I didn't know he was going to die until about a paragraph before Anita found him dead. I thought, until the last possible moment, we'd save him. But we didn't, we couldn't. It was the first time I cried for one of my characters.

Well, given that this was her first (original) novel, and nobody "good" had died before, that's somehow not very surprising, IMHO.

And it doesn't surprise me that she was running into this at random. Again, I cannot help but wonder if there was some input from her ex, because in a better author's works, this would be a turning point emotionally. And not for Teh Sex Buddies.

I cried for his death. I cried because we couldn't save him. I cried because he'd been trying to get his life together, and making some progress, and now all of his chances were gone.

Okay, two things:
1. Who is "we"?
2. Is LKH aware that Phillip COULD NOT have any more chances, or get his life together, because ultimately he was a collection of words on a page? At best, an idea?
3. Furthermore, is she aware that she COULD have "saved" him had she wanted, especially since she magically "saves" all Anita's penii via ridiculous methods in recent books? And therefore, she is just being all melodramatic again?

Ron's art reminded me that Phillip didn't expect to be saved. He gave up before Anita did, before I did. It was all there in Phillip's eyes

Of course, her opinions may be clouded by the fact that she now KNOWS that he's gonna croak. Moreover, REALITY LINES BLURRED ALERT.

Of all the people we've lost in the books, Phillip's death hurt me and Anita the most. That pain, those shed tears, are probably one of the main reasons we have a cast of dozens but few deaths of main characters. It hurt too much.

That, and since she can't separate reality and fantasy, she made a pwomise to her heroine to never kill off the penii. All others are expendable.

I told them how his art had effected me,

AFFECTED, dammit.

and assured him that I was sane about all the other characters.

Did she mention the part where she talks to them and they talk back, she buys presents for them, makes promises to them, refers to her pain with Anita's, etc?

I guess it was a complement.

ComPLIMent, dammit.

I miss Phillip. I miss him almost like a friend that died young. You think about them every once in awhile.

Oh, here we go again. Aren't there any characters, except those evil jellus bigots, whom she doesn't obsess on?

What would have changed in Anita's life if Phillip had survived that first book? Would we be looking at him as her one and only boyfriend, and would he have taken up too much room for Jean-Claude to invade? Or would it just have been Richard who wouldn't have found enough room to be in her life?

Or would he have become another doe-eyed long-haired walking penis, drifting through the house in the forlorn hope that Anita will boink him today, because he loves her soooooo much, and her LUUUUUUUV saved him from his addictions and traumas and blah blah blah?

Anita still dreams of him, and his death, and her failure.

Okay, creepy.. It's very, very weird that she refers to her character "dreaming" in the present tense as if this person lives in her house. Ye damns.

Because that's how she sees it, as her failure.

And as a lost chance to shag yet another broken, sexually traumatized, long-haired, ginormously-hung stripper.

We killed those that murdered him. We've had all the revenge we can have for Phillip. It didn't bring him back. It never does. More's the pity.

Somehow I can imagine LKH rocking to and fro in her darkened office, grinning maniacally at the screen and muttering, "We did it, precious. We killed them all, killed them, bathed in their blood, precious... we gots our revenge, precious..."

Comments

[ravenclaw-devi.livejournal.com]

I miss Phillip. I miss him almost like a friend that died young.

Okay, I can understand how your own creative works can have meaning to you and be dear to you - but to miss a fictional character you created like you'd miss a dead friend? What kind of person makes this kind of comparison?

[ravenhaley.livejournal.com]

Well that explains why LKH decided to name a character Frost.

But I don't think Frost meant to think of characters as real people. The line between reality and fantasty is not rocket science.

I cried for his death. I cried because we couldn't save him. I cried because he'd been trying to get his life together, and making some progress, and now all of his chances were gone.

Um ... does LKH not remember she is the author? What a moron. She is the one who decided to kill the character.

Oh wait, I bet you it wasn't her idea at the time but either her ex-husband or her first editor. *eyeroll*

I told them how his art had effected me, and assured him that I was sane about all the other characters. It was just Phillip's death, and how well he had captured that look, that air of tragedy, that had messed with my head

LKH would be effectived if someone told her they think everyone should die in the books but Edward. She would probably be crying her eyes out at the mean jealous people who would tell her that.

The men in white coats need to come faster. This woman gets crazier with each new day. I mean she already thinks her characters are real, she buys them presents ... what is next in the crazy world that is LKH?

THEY'RE NOT REAL, LAURELL

[atypia.livejournal.com]

Thank you for this. I was overcome with horror at her blog post, and hoped someone else could share the crazy with everyone. I wasn't able to do it, it was just too crazy.

*rocks back and forth*

[suzycat.livejournal.com]

No! You're interrogating LKH's spelling from the wrong perspective!

When she says Ron's art "effects" her, she means it *brings her into being*. Without it, she simply does not exist. She is born anew when she looks at the image of Philip. Emo Chained Up Fictional Character's art death completes her. Hence, it is a complement.

[tsubaki-ny.livejournal.com]

You're good.

[kessie.livejournal.com]

LKH makes me ashamed that I like goth music.

As to the rest... it's safer to focus on the spelling than anything else. :/

[gothgoddessrhia.livejournal.com]

Betcha she doesn't listen to Goth music. She's probably never heard of Ego Likeness, London After Midnight, Rosetta Stone, Two Witches, Nosferatu, Switchblade Symphony or any of the other bands Goths love.

[plum-arden.livejournal.com]

I fully admit that I don't remember much of the books once I read them, but once reminded, it floods back. Now, that being said...

Who's Phillip?

As for the rest of that, it disturbs me greatly. Makes me want to write a story/book that just kills everyone, and really take the line "no one gets out alive" to the next level. Ugh. She disturbs me.

[amamelina.livejournal.com]

Philip was the only good guy to ever die in any of the books. He shows up in the first book as a vampire junkie and helps Anita. Kinda. He also hits on her and is captured by the bad guy and is killed, raised, and set to rest. All in all, I thought that was cool. But, seriously, no one good ever died after that. It was, in my opinion, probably the best she's ever written. It took a chance that none of the other books had. We've had close calls with Richard and Zebrowski (The Z-man made my heart stop cause I adore him), but those were early books, too. Now, there is no danger of any of the good guys getting so much as a splinter.

[baeraad.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh yes. That's the LKH we know and are morbidly fascinated by...

I can never get over how proud she seems to be about her weepy melodrama. No wonder she never seeks the professional help she so desperately needs. She thinks getting over-emotional over fictional characters is a virtue.

[nightangel486.livejournal.com]

I understand that LKH lost her mother when she was very young, and that it's probably hard for her to cope with death for this reason.

But extending that to fictional characters just indicates that this woman is completely out of touch with reality. Sure, I've cried during emotional scenes or deaths in books, but then I move on with my life because I understand that these people are not real. It's just further evidence that LKH is using her books as some kind of catharsis, but that it's really not working to help her cope with anything at all, hence the repetetive wangsting and wish-fulfillment in each book.

[kerame.livejournal.com]

Why would she want to deal with reality when she can create her own?

Philip was a dependent, pathetic loser, just the way Laurita likes her men. He's probably the character her second husband identified so strongly with that he created the cyber-shrine to Laurell and devoted himself to worming himself into her life. She created her ideal man, then he walked into her life. The other president of her fan club was Darla, a woman who is both fanatically devoted to her, and too unattractive to be any sexual competition, just the way Laurita likes her women.

Maybe her crotch writing really does have magical, wish-fulfilling properties?

[leggomylegolas.livejournal.com]

It absolutely drives me nuts that she refuses to take responsibility for what happens in her own books. I don't know if she does that because it's like, MAGIKAL WRITING VOODOO or if she's just a huge fucking coward. Actually, it's probably both.

[clover-elf-kin.livejournal.com]

Honestly? Sometimes there really is little or no choice to be had about certain plots or where they go. I have at least one story where I tried to avoid putting the character through something particularly nasty, and eventually realized I couldn't--I had no plot without it.

Of course, I then cackled that while I had no idea what this was going to do to her, it should certainly be interesting.

[moonsinger.livejournal.com]

Wow, it is one thing to love your characters, but it is a whole different dimension to believe that they are real like LKH does. She seriously needs a good psychiatrist/psychologist or happy pills.

[bluesauce.livejournal.com]

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: If I ever get this batshit, somebody needs to take me out behind a building and end me, dammit. knowthyself, this is your job.

Has anybody ever seen another author, outside of a mental institution, get this attached to their characters? I know that for RP and when writing characters can go completely against what an author or player would do(been there, seen that, done that even), but I've never seen someone get attached and refer to the characters like they're real, except LKH.

[knowthyself.livejournal.com]

Done and done.

Seriously, I can understand getting attached to a character, and how sometimes your characters come alive enough that they kind of tell you what's going to happen--but it's because you've written them enough that it's just that natural. And it's kind of cool when it happens, too. But yeah, LKH here seems to take that to a whoooole new and scary level here!

[sharkbytes.livejournal.com]

I get the impression that LKH thinks being goth (and her perky goth shirt that she wears all the time is evidence of the fact that she does characterize herself that way) is about how you dress and what you listen to/read. Which is a small part, really. And that really pisses me off!!

Anyway, back to the blog, that's a whole lot of crazy. I understand feeling a connection with your characters, but Phillip? Really? I've read books/series where I was truly saddened at a character's death, and Phillip doesn't get so much as a blip on the radar. Whether LKH realizes it or not, he was written to die, and any other outcome would have ruined the book completely.

[darkese.livejournal.com]

My feelings as well. Phillip who? He died? He was a junky? Not even a blip.

I think LKH's claim that it's still tearing Anita up would mean something if Anita EVER thought about Phillip EVER. Or visited his grave, or talked about him, or dreamed about him, or acknowledged his life and death in ANY way. If never thinking about or mentioning someone is a sign of being torn up about them then, sure, yeah, I'm real torn up too.

[knowthyself.livejournal.com]

And one more thing, since her blog is new to me--seriously? That's your color scheme? What are you, a 15-year-old goth girl who wants people to think she's got some troubled poet's soul?

....Oh, wait. That's right.

[bluesauce.livejournal.com]

But, but, she's all darkity-dark! Can't you tell by the color scheme?!

She's about as dark & deep & scary as your icon.

[x-trickster-x.livejournal.com]

I swear that HAS to be it. If she's really like this then she needs help but I have this sneaking suspicion that it's just a big show. Someone needs to tell her that we're not buying.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

The part I get unstuck is at the whole failure to save him issue. I can understand being surprised by a turn of character in writing as things can go WOO UNEXPECTED AND NAKED! but ye gods...the whole, "I failed! We failed! We could have saved him!" is just...well, I expect it from Will Smith in I Am Legend. I expect it from tough-as-nails investigators that are invested in saving lives and puppies. I don't really expect it from authors.

Phillip had to die. He was the emotional lynch pin in the whole piece. IMO, there was closure when he was finally laid to rest. QED.

And surely today, of all days, really hammers in that this sort of thing happens IRL more than we want. Phillip's death was probably one of the few things that went toward building Anita's world as real and that things don't work out the way you always want.

[tenaya-owlcat.livejournal.com]

I've gotta echo everyone else and say that I just don't get this. How can you fail to save a character? O.o How can you get to the point where you can't understand that they're not real?

And if she misses Phillip that much (and I admit, I forgot who he was too...), why not write a flashback that focuses on him? Oh wait... that would involve actual plot, now wouldn't it?

*snorts with disgust* This woman is of the batshit crazy.

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

I've got an image of an emo Phillip coming back in Anita's latest adventure as a horny little ghost with a big penis.

[darkese.livejournal.com]

Here is the artwork that tore poor LKH up.
http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b143/DrIsoscele/ABLKVAMG010.jpg

It's pretty mediocre art work.

[amamelina.livejournal.com]

dude, seriously, he is waaaay to pretty to have just been tortured. Had he been one of mine, I would have demanded some bruising and more then just mysterious blood running down his body. Let's see some cuts! Make me believe he was beaten. Man, my mental picture from the book was a whole lot better then this.

Re: We are confused

[duchym.livejournal.com]

Perhaps it is a "royal" we?

[daphne-gateau.livejournal.com]

Ya know the crying doesn't mean anything to me. I'm the type to cry about books, about movies, about things I write. I've even been known to cry when other people's RP characters die. Or if Nik isn't showing a new Avatar episode again. ;) Am I a dork? Hell yeah. Does this make me more of an 'artiste' or better connected to my characters? Not even. Usually it just means I'm hormonal. And that's my take on her too. The crap she writes in her blog does not make her sound like a teenage poem-reading artiste with a special connection to creativity. It's kinda of pathetic that she doesn't see that.

Maybe she's not in control of her emotions. Fine. But I lose respect for her every time she says she isn't in control of her books. Fact is she could have saved Phillip. She could bring him back still. She could do a lot of things - like stick to a plot. But no, she'd rather say the characters won't let her.

Am I the only one that sees a little dig at Richard/her ex? My thinking on Richard is that if Anita had been dating a vampire-addicted stripper he would never have been interested in the first place. Oh poo. Now *I* wish Phillip hadn't died either. ;)

[michael-b-lee.livejournal.com]

Your icon is pure awesome.

Dating Philip

[ladymuttly1.livejournal.com]

For the life of me I couldn't see the old Anita dating Phillip. Back in 1991 the (fictional) girl had some balls. If Phillip had survived his encounter with the vamps, and the real LKH had been writing the story, Anita would have kicked Phillip out of her life for being too damn damaged. Now that LKH has been replaced with emo author she's going back and retconning Anita's emotions.

Re: Dating Philip

[daphne-gateau.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I found Phillip annoying to read. Back in GP I thought Anita was written to be annoyed by him also, which I appreciated since I agreed. I began to wonder if I imagined that part since the latest blog seems to suggest they were dating already.

I never felt chemistry between those two characters. In that book I think it was clearly JC with the romantic potential (that kiss in the rain). I'm ashamed to admit I predicted a love triangle between JC/Anita/Edward. One that ended with Edward blowing JC away. Dude, was I wrong. But Phillip? No way.

[wyrdmuse.livejournal.com]

I like to think that Frost would have thrown up a little to know that LKH is using his quotation as a justification to write self-insert porn. The entry just goes into a creepy place I was hoping I wouldn't ever have to see. I've been known to get a little bummed out when one of my characters dies, but then I go back to the beginning of my work and s/he is alive again. It's magic!

[dinsedaledarby.livejournal.com]

She's crazy.
I should say something more profound and thoughtful here... but seriously. She's crazy. Who thinks like that?
If she's like this with her fictional characters, imagine how she'd be if a real person close to her died.
Death is a natural part of life. It would add a level of humanity to her novels that they could certainly use. it would make the reader care more if they knew anything could happen. her books are like bad fan fiction with everything turning out the way she wished it would in real life. That's a healthy way to think all the time.

[dinsedaledarby.livejournal.com]

i mean unhealthy way, sorry

[longtail.livejournal.com]

The fact Phillip DID die was kind of what got me into LKH's writing in the first place. For once, the heroine DOESN'T get to save the day. That was cool. Anita's reaction and pain was cool. It was more realistic.

I think it would have been nice, if Anita still dreams about Phillip, to have brought him up in a later book or have her revisit it in more of a blurb if she was sooooo deeply "effected." No, a book or two later we got Richard, Phillip's replacement. Looks and wangsts like Phillip, only it's new and improved Phillip!

And because LKH can't seperate reality from her own fiction, we get hordes of weak little supernatural bishonen having bad sex with a boring, bitchy woman that doesn't deserve it and doesn't do anything interesting anymore. YUCK.

[kerame.livejournal.com]

Nathaniel was the Philip replacement, not Richard.

He was an early indicator of Laurita's predeliction for dependent, pathetic men who yearn to be utterly dominated by her.

[everstar3.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad other people were like, "Wait, who's Philip?"

(Also, I'm desperately hoping that others among us read the title of her blog post and immediately got "My Immortal" stuck in his or her head. It will make me feel less alooooone.)

I'm trying to decide why it is that when LKH writes about mourning the death of her characters, it seems absurd, but when J. K. Rowling mentions that she cried for certain characters, it doesn't seem silly to me. I suppose it's because JKR does it without the histrionics.

[darkese.livejournal.com]

Because JKR doesn't do it for a minor character who's raison d'etre was to die, in a book she wrote 15 years ago.

[the-mome-wrath.livejournal.com]

Am I the only one who thinks that she hams it up for her blogs?

I think she wrote that blog to try and get the worshippers all up in a frenzy. That way she can hear more emotional praises and reaffirm her decision to not kill of anymore main characters.