pith: (basic-typeit!)
[personal profile] pith posting in [community profile] lkh_lashouts
Title: Mouton Enragé
Spoilers: up to and including CS, but very general
Warnings: Not to be taken even remotely seriously.
Disclaimers: LKH owns the characters and the Anitaverse. The term actually was in the Weird & Wonderful Words page-a-day calendar. The fic is mine. My precious, my own! ;-)


Anita had worked with the police and RPIT enough to know that surveillance video didn't lie, but this was different. That was her Nimir-Raj, Micah Callahan, splayed on the floor, spread-eagled, riddled with vampire bites. He looked like a gang member on the losing end of a shootout, except all the holes weeping dark, thick blood onto the Circus floor were from fangs, not bullets. And standing behind Anita were the four vampires responsible.

Damian and Willie at least had the good grace to look chagrined, lingering near the door in hopes of a quick and relatively painless retreat. Asher and Jean-Claude, however, flanked her, expressions blank and beautiful. 'It had to be done, ma petite,' Jean-Claude insisted.

Anita jabbed the stop button on the VCR and glared up at her vampire lovers. 'And why is that?'

Asher stepped forward. 'He attacked Nathaniel without provocation, Anita, bad enough to put our young cat in Dr. Lillian's hospital.'

'But—why? It makes no sense!'

Asher knelt beside Anita, piercing her with his barely-blue eyes. 'Cherie, we wanted to spare you the pain, but... your Nimir-Raj... Overexposure to your ardeur made him become a mouton enragé.'

'Enough of the damn French,' Anita snapped. 'What does that mean?'

'Mouton enragé in itself means "mad sheep",' Asher explained. 'But it is far more sinister. It is a person in the darkest depths of madness—a usually calm person intoxicated by their rage. Unlike the "temporary insanity" your human courts bandy about, this is not so easily broken. It took the four of us to subdue him, and even then, he nearly castrated Damian.'

Anita glanced back at the Viking and saw that the bulge under his loose belt was larger than normal, so he must have been bandaged up.

'We tried to save him, ma cherie, but we could not release him from the throes of his frenzy. You have our deepest apologies.' Jean-Claude sighed. 'Willie, Damian, please take Anita to her Nimir-Raj.' The two other vampires led the distraught necromancer away, leaving Asher and Jean-Claude alone. 'Brilliantly played,' Jean-Claude murmured in his lover's ear. 'Wherever did you come up with mouton enragé?'

'Nathaniel keeps a "Weird & Wonderful Words" calendar by the bed. It is how we decide on his safe word. When Monsieur Nimir-Raj interrupted our revels, it was the first thing I saw when I looked up.' Asher shook his head. 'You think he'd be accustomed to Nathaniel's screams coming from our room by now—'

'You were a little rougher tonight than normal,' Jean-Claude pointed out.

'That is true. But it is my kitten's birthday. I wanted him to have a special gift.' Asher smiled. 'When he returns to us from the hospital, we shall have to welcome him accordingly.'

'Yes,' Jean-Claude agreed, 'we shall.'

Date: 2006-05-08 07:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dwg.livejournal.com
OMG.

I think my brain just exploded.

You have made me one very, very, very happy fangirl. EEEE!!!

Date: 2006-05-09 02:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dwg.livejournal.com
Double the yay! No, no, don't mind JC joining in at all. This fic is going down in the "things that make me happy" files. It's impossible not to smile while reading it.

Date: 2006-05-08 02:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dragon-mouse.livejournal.com
Oohhhhh... *grins insanely* I love it! That was AWESOME!
I laughed out loud at the mouton enrage (don't know how to put in an accent...), glad you got to use it!

Date: 2006-05-09 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saadiira.livejournal.com
mouton enrage DIES. Oh, that was GOOOD.

:D

-Dira-

Date: 2006-05-09 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] delphinapterus.livejournal.com
That was wonderful. Jean-Claude and Asher actually using their brains. I shall never think of sheep the same way.

Date: 2006-05-10 05:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ayako.livejournal.com
The first thing I thought when I saw the title of your fic:

If I remember my French correctly...mouton means...

Hahahha..all those damned French classes did teach me something.

Sorry, for the tangent. French just takes me back.

Brilliant fic ^^

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